Home Buying 1: Outrageous Assumptions

Over the last few months, I have been trying to become a homeowner in Los Angeles. Like every big venture, this one is also based on certain assumptions, some of which are outrageous and based on nothing but preposterous optimism.

The most outrageous of them all is the assumption that the world, this country, my house and I will live on and thrive for 30 years. This assumption sounds almost ridiculous when one considers my age (32), the age of the house (42), the age of this country, and the age of this world, coupled with the current state of world affairs. In my mind, this is the assumption that is most likely to fail. But do I care? Do I give a damn? No. I am more worried about 'exciting' things like 'Do I want a gray, plush carpet or a maple hardwood floor?' and 'Does the house conform to Vaastu principles?'.

Some other outrageous assumptions are 'I shall continue to grow richer, and will be able to recover from this huge debt', 'The value of my house will definitely increase', 'I shall be happier than before by being a homeowner', 'I will definitely get a better interest rate when I refinance my loan' and 'My family will look up to me and say, Hey, you know you did the right thing by blowing away three-quarters of a million dollars on a ungainly hunk of concrete, metal, glass and wood'.

In the home buying process, there are only two things that are guaranteed - 1. I shall live a debt-ridden life for the next 30 years, and 2. My lender will always be there to hound me during this entire time, no matter what happens to me, the house, or the world.

Yet, millions will buy homes this year, like the billions who already have, and the billions who will in the future. And every one of them will take these outrageous assumptions in their stride, and think they did a great job, made a very wise decision, and that they deserve praise and applause.
And worse still, they will get it. The people around them will look up to them as great achievers, will seek their advice and countenance, lap up every word they have to say, and repeat the same follies without a qualm.

If we ever get outsmarted by another species, most likely the ants, the main reason given out would be 'In justifying the rationality of buying million dollar homes, man achieved such gargantuan levels of stupidity that the brain began to lose its efficiency and capability of functioning correctly, and over a period of evolution, gradually lost all power and became a vestigial organ like the appendix. And we, the ants, jumped in at that point, and took over.